Liliana - BDSM Rules

We are currently working on healing from past abuse. My pup likes to hit himself when he is frustrated with himself or feels like he is the cause of something. I am implementing a "No Hitting" rule when he gets like that. He knows he is to give me his hands when he wants to hit himself, and if I'm not around and he does, he has to write lines and reflect on how his behavior affects his mental health and how he can avoid/correct this behavior in the future.

Dying and self harm are not allowed under any circumstances. This applies to the Dominant and submissive. ~ Anonymous

If my slave/sub is feeling anxious or stressed I have them say the mantra "Master/Dom chose me!", it seems to help, they tell me. It re-centers them. ~ MedicLPN

I shall journal every morning as the first activity for the day. This ensures if there are negative issues, that they don't circulate in my mind throughout the day. It helps to clarify the issues and to release them. I must not hold back or try to make things look pretty - raw emotion only. Each journal entry must end with either: a lesson learned or a positive note.

I must Yoga at least 3 times per week with rewards for more sessions. This was recommended by my psychologist and has helped me tremendously. Yoga teaches you mindfulness (to be present). This is important because I would often escape into dreamland where I would play out scenarios in my mind, which would often lead to negative assumptions.

As someone who struggles a lot with anxiety, having a codified, written and mutually consenting agreement really helps a lot of knowing what is acceptable and appreciated in a dynamic. It's reaffirming to have these discussions over even minor and sometimes assumed dynamics and opens the door to communication that might otherwise be closed. While not for everyone, protocols and contracts can help those who struggle with similar experiences to find peace in what could normally be a difficult to navigate dynamic. ~ Ryona

One of my favorite rules is no negative self talk. I have a disability and was in a pretty rough relationship before current one. My daddy noticed that I was repeating all the negative things my ex said about me. Between that and feeling guilty about my disability keeping me from doing things, I was spending all day putting myself down. It was a hard rule at first, but it truly changed my attitude about myself and several family members and friends have commented on how I'm back to my old, happy self. ~ Alicat